Sup? In this one, I go on and on about Dr. Drew, a fucking invasion of ants, how brilliant of a movie Rocky IV is, lame Oscar parties, how great backyard horror movies are, and all of this with occasional commentary from The Ramble’s 1st ever guest: My awful impersonation of Tone Loc! So go get live with a honey and check this motherfucker out! Love you all
Why hello there! In this Ramble I don’t shut my fucking mouth about several things while I sing the theme from Three’s Company over and over. That song has been in my fucking head for 30 years now. I’m sorry. Anyway back to the ramble: I blab about Christopher Dorner (basically how he would have been a hero had he just gone after the people who hand out parking tickets), Oscar Pistorius (backing up my belief that you should never trust white people from Africa), a great & crappy show I did (I do a lot of those, but this one was pretty damned memorable), a NINE time Juggling World Champion (Fucking Jordan didn’t even win NINE fucking times), The sad truth about relationships (if you choose not to be a cheating pile of shit, then you quickly run out of shit to masturbate to which leads to several desperate and sad google searches), and I give a shout out to Subdivisions by Rush. I hope you folks enjoy it. Thank you as always for listening!
Howdy, In this here ramble, I have some final thoughts on the Super Bowl, talk about dumb chicks, and dumber guys, question how the fuck some people can become friends, lament how cheated you feel when you give sympathy to someone you later find out is a pile of shit, and most importantly of all, I defend the shit Billy Joel and Springsteen put out in the 80′s. I hope you enjoy this one, and I thank you for listening.
Howdy! In this one, I go on about High School Sweethearts, High School Reunions, and a Lord of The Rings like quest to get an abortion, all while butchering .38 Special the whole time. Enjoy!
In this one, I bullshit about meeting the world’s friendliest sex offender, talk about sexual debauchery at Subway and Jamba Juice, talk about a special needs hating douche in Houston, the kick-ass waiter who told him to fuck off, and how much fun I’m having playing Kane & Lynch 2 Dog Days, even though it came out fucking years ago. Oh and, I butcher Howard Jones and Daryl Hall & John Oates. Enjoy, and a mighty fucking thank you for listening.
Howdy, here right here I run my mouth off about how choosing to live life equals taking some shit from time to time, the bullshit scam of Los Angeles “street cleaning”, how as bad as taking shit can be, getting your dick sucked is somehow able to wipe the slate clean. Also included is a fight my girlfriend and I had where she had the balls to NOT put the Millennium Falcon at #1 in all time spaceships, that my friends is fucking unacceptable, and I don’t give a fuck about the Serenity (a flying duck), the fucking Tardis (a fucking time machine, not a fucking spaceship) or whatever else she threw out there. Finally, I get all warm and fuzzy remembering the time I saw the great Japanese band Mono in Denton way back when. Oh, and I sing Gary Wright’s “Love is Alive”. That alone should be worth the price of admission. Thanks for listening, and see you soon. I love you all.
Hey Yo! I hope all is well. In this one I talk about the tragic de-evolution of Jefferson Airplane, how much Assassin’s Creed III sucks, video game characters having more money than me, how Starbucks makes you gay, Girlfriends subconsciously making you take a dive, and The Pixies.
Hope you enjoy this, and see you soon!
I hope you are all well.
In this Muthafucka, I talk about how in the entire Nashville Skyline by Dylan, he sings like he had a kid fucking Kermit the Frog and Yoda. How the Girl From The North Country duet with Johnny Cash may be the best duet ever. I get the most obvious heckle ever. The shit feeling of getting stuck in your own head. What I fear my girlfriend’s vagina would say if it could talk. Being patient with Yo Mama, and of course, cockblocking dear Ma. All that and a shout out to Royal Fingerbowl.
Thanks for listening, and see you soon!
Hello! First all, I’d like to extend a big fucking THANK YOU to all the great folk who came out to see me at Stand Up Live! In Phoenix, AZ! I had a blast, and I hope you did too.
In this fucking one, I run my mouth off about how great it is to sing: “Under My Thumb” by The Stones when your girl is going off on Women’s Rights.
I get made a fuck out of by some uppity pile of dog shit I tried to help in a parking lot.
Headlights staying on an extra eight seconds is the most useless feature in a car fucking ever.
I finally finished the very good, but way to fucking gimmicky House Of Leaves.
And I just started reading a great book on the motherfucking DREAM TEAM!!! The ORIGIONAL one, not these new ones that lose to Argentina every fucking chance they get.
Thanks for listening, and talk soon!
-Jerry (who the fuck else would it be?? It’s my fucking website. Of course it should be me signing off)
First off, I would like to apologize to any Beatles fans for my butchering of “I Should Have Known Better”, but fuck it, it was in my head, and this isn’t the fucking voice.
In this Ramble, I talk about how great the movie Seven Psychopaths is, and how when my girl and I saw the movie at a local dollar theater, I helped get an abrasive homeless dude thrown out. I immediately felt awful.
Then, I talk about how I really wanted to get into a fight with two sets of fans when my beloved Mavericks came to town to lose to the Clippers, and afterwards, I immediately felt awful about that too.
Really this one is just about me feeling fucking awful after being a grumpy cunt.
Thanks again for listening.